by Kim Merritt

Hale-Bopp Earrings

On March 26, 1997, authorities discovered 39 cosmic travelers. Every one of them donned a uniform of black shirt, sweatpants, and brand new black and white Nike Decades sneakers. They stowed $5 notes and three quarters in their pockets to cover vagrancy fines any phone calls they might deem necessary. Their armbands labeled them members of Heaven’s Gate Away Team. They appreciated humor, even though many of them underwent consensual castration.

 

Their mothership cruised in the wake of the Hale-Bopp comet that glorified the sky that year. Their only hope in reaching it lied within the forfeiture of their terrestrial flesh bags. They ate phenobarbital, chased with vodka, then tied plastic bags around their heads to ensure the teleportation process of their faith succeeded.

 

You may have forgotten this lovely nugget of history. Thankfully, Gritty Jewelry exists to remind everybody of their inherent potential

Behold, the Hale-Bopp selections. They are available as part of Gritty’s Weight collection, because comets are heavy.

 

Sterling silver rocks tie to chain to create that perfect suicide pact environment.

 

Never forget your celestial overlords. They wouldn’t appreciate that.

Hale-Bopp Earrings